Monday, October 28, 2013

Special day gone to H*** in a handbasket

    Just when I had resigned myself to homeschooling a 4th grader sporting depends, my baby was sporting panties and signed up for Preschool. Since we got in just under the wire, I had a lot to do in very little time.  Suddenly it was a few days before her first day, and I realized that Monday was her last true day of freedom.  For at least the next 15 years, returning to school would be looming over her head whether it was a weekend, holiday or summer break. Gone were the days of carefree living.
    A better Mom probably would have planned it out better with special shaped pancakes, decorations, and extra special activities. I had nothing, so I asked Syd was she wanted to do. One of her favorite activities is to go to the Mall. We walk around and ride the elevator a bajillion times and then get smoothies and soft pretzels.  Pretty simple but exciting, I totally got this!
    It was just one of those mornings when it was hard to get out of the house. Not sure why, it was just some sort of morning funk [warning #1!]  I grabbed all our stuff and buckled everyone up. I had to stop at the bank and it took longer than expected [ warning #2!] After I got everyone back in the van, I started talking up how much fun we were going to have at the Mall and how great they were for being patient. If my life was a horror movie, this is the point where you would be throwing popcorn at the screen, telling me to turn around and go back. Then you would yell that I was so stupid as I pushed on the gas pedal.
   Nathan was pretty quiet the whole ride [ warning #3] and I discover why once we arrived. The little Devil figured out how to pull the top off his sippy cup and his shirt was drenched. I started to panic. I only had back up clothes for Syd in the diaper bag. It was a tank top with ruffles. Could I be the mom with the boy in the ruffle shirt? I looked at Syd's joyful face and said yes. Then I changed his shirt and pulled him out. I noticed his shorts were wet. I only had a skirt in the diaper bag. I definitely couldn't do that. I told Syd we might not be able to go to the mall. Her little lips started to quiver and she went on about how we are already here and I promised. Could I be the mom with the kid in wet pants? No, well maybe, Syd's puppy dog eyes were really working. I looked down and uh oh! Nathan's pants got my pants wet. Could I be the mom who looked like she peed her pants too? Could we be the pants peeing family strolling around the Mall? Heck no! Stupid sippy cup! Stupid Mommy! Why didn't I plan something else!
    To say Syd didn't handle the news well, is putting it mildly. The poor thing was so confused because we were there. She saw the "holy grail" and we were leaving! She sobbed and sobbed! "But you promised, Mommy!" Tears were streaming down my face. I just kept crying, "I'm sorry! I'm Sorry!" I ruined her life! This monumental day and I couldn't even get her inside the mall. I was the worst mother in the entire world! Epic failure! ( Looking back, I think that just maybe I wasn't handling this whole school milestone as well as I thought.) We both cried the entire 15 minute drive home while Nathan was blissfully unaware of  the distraught females in his life, typical male!
    Still crying when we returned home, I searched desperately for something to ease her pain.  "How about a saltwater taffy?" I asked in between sniffles. She cried "Can I have two?" I handed her two and gone were the tears. She smiled and skipped off with her saltwater taffies like nothing happened. Mean while, I felt like I had been rung out in the wash. All this drama and I could have just given her candy before lunch and relaxed at home.

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