Today is Sydney's 5th birthday. That means that I have been a parent for 5 years! That can't be right!?! It feels like just yesterday even though some of those days felt like an eternity and then some. I've learned a few things along the way and thought that I would jot them down!
1. I don't know anything! Yes, that's right! I know NOTHING! Then why are you listening to my advice? I'm really not sure, you should probably reevaluate your life choices! Just kidding! The only reason that I have advice is because I learn a lot after the fact. I usually feel like I am stumbling around like an idiot for each new step. ( Even with Nathan I am clueless, the 2nd kids like to change it all up on you)
2. I had no comprehension of what the word "tired" meant before kids. Same goes for the phrase "my house is so dirty!"
3. Don't judge other parents! Your kids will find a way to make you humble and put you in your place!
4. Kids only poop at the park if you have forgotten diapers
5. Don't even bother planning car trips around nap schedules. They will do the opposite of what you expect!
6. If your child finally falls asleep in the car, you will hit every red light, have to pay a toll, and/or need to stop for gas.
7. At some point you have to admit that frumpy is in fact your new style. The "I know I look like a slob, but it's okay, it was one of those days " excuse doesn't work when you say it everyday.
8. Baby food defies all the laws of gravity.
9. What once was gross is now your new normal (Being puked on really changes your perspective)
10. Toddler Law: What's mine is MINE! What's yours is MINE! What's theirs is MINE! That thing I touched before but don't even care about... MINE! That thing in the store will be MINE!
11. It matters which color cup the milk goes in!
12. Write everything down, even if you think that you will remember it all (see #2)
13. Baby socks are the devil!!
14. You just can't LET IT GO no matter how many times you try to get the song out of your head!
15. Know where all the local playgrounds are; it will save your life.
16. Can't afford to take them to an amusement park? Just let them ride the mall elevator a million times.
17. Establish kid friendly alternatives to swear words! Even if you didn't swear before, you'll need them!
18. Your parents are smiling because you are raising a mini you and watching someone else go through what they went through is hysterical.
19. Cuddles are the best ever!!!
20. You know you know more than this but..... that whole new understanding of the word "tired" thing.... Can. Not. Type. Anymore....... soooooo sleeee..........
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